In just a few hours our house will be full of friends. We are expecting about 30 today, not bad for a quick throw-together kind of 4th of July party. We'll have burgers, and brats, and apple pie, and nachos and play in the pool, listen to music, and of course play some cards. Chairs will be littered with colorful beach towels, the dogs will be in all of their glory running around enjoying all of the people (and searching endlessly for scraps that have be dropped or plates of food that were haphazardly left at nose level...)
I know it will be fun, but again today I find my heart so heavy. Yesterday was the same. I woke up thinking about my Dad, and how it was just 6 months ago that he fell and broke his hip. That was January 3rd...on January 4th we were still visiting him in the hospital...on the 5th he went in for his surgery and never came out. I'm not sure why it's hitting me so hard these last two days. Maybe it's the 6 month milestone? Who knows. All I know is that I miss him terribly. I've been thinking of him SO much...he loved days like today. He should be here, in his "regular" spot, playing cards, and whipping up on everyone.
Instead, there will be an empty chair.
I hope they play cards in heaven.